Emotion ~ energy in motion?!

My daughter Kristyna found a summer job abroad and flew away for several weeks. Though it is not the first time she is away from me, this time I am struck by an unbelievably strong emotion of sadness. I am sure that all mothers of a teenager know exactly what I am talking about… right? If there is only one universal energy taking different forms and vibrating at different frequencies, and if emotion is this same energy, I confess: it can be quite heavy sometimes..!

Frankly, I don’t recall when the last time was that I felt as moved by such a deep emotion… I have heard that emotion is just our energy in motion, therefore I wonder what this experience has to tell me about mine. How can I use the energy creatively? Am I capable to fully accept and work with my emotion, not against it?

As I am going through the sadness, I have three realizations:

First of all, I am more than my emotions – I am actually the scene on which emotions appear. That’s why I can become aware of the emotion in the first place! Suddenly, a small gap appears between me and the emotion… I know there are 7 basic levels when it comes to our energy. Which level does the sadness correspond to? What physical sensation does the emotion trigger? I feel a tension located in my chest. What is this telling me about what might be important for me? What is it I need now and how can I incorporate that into my life? I understand it’s love. I focus on my breath and imagine the air is love, ever present in me and around me. I accept my need of love.

At this point I consider expressing the emotion; now, that could be challenging. This is because our society might not allow us to express all of our emotions. Plus there is a gender bias relative to emotions. If you’re a man, your surroundings might be typically more tolerant of you feeling strong emotions such as anger. Being a woman, I was at times not accepted for feeling anger, while it was socially ok to have the emotion of sadness. I also experienced quite a few occasions when I was told to show less emotion, in effect to be emotionless… That was really hard! Is it even possible for human beings to be emotionless? After all, it’s my emotions that guide me, drive my motivation and affect my behavior. I realize that whether I express the emotion or not, I radiate emotions and in a sense spread them to others in any case. We are subtly connected to each other, and as quantum physicists have discovered long ago, each particle affects and is affected by all other particles. Like waves in the ocean, we seem to be all connected on a deep level, yet each individual wave is slightly different and by its uniqueness affecting the surrounding waves.

Lastly, I experiment with the energy of sadness by simply allowing and observing it until it dissolves or changes into something else. Instead of rushing to beat the sadness with some external entertainment such as movies, phone calls, food or drinks, I just acknowledge the emotion and let it be. I cry for a while and then I focus on breathing into my chest where I sense the sadness.

I accept the now; and what is happening at this very moment; and this includes the sadness. And that’s ok. I am not the first mother to feel this way; and I am sure I will not be the last. Like all the others I too will get over this. As with any other emotion, this too is my energy in motion. Surprisingly, it seems to be transforming. Where would I like to direct this released energy towards? I feel inspired to write a blog about it!

I noticed we don’t need to identify with our emotions, we radiate them out whether we like it or not, and we can creatively use its energy once it starts moving. With a bit of simplification there are only two choices in terms of our response to anything – fear or love. We either resist or accept. Accepting the sadness gets me closer to love and away from fear. How does this affect my energy? The more I am aware, authentic and grounded in the present moment, the more vitality and love I feel. More vitality and love leads me to increased creativity. Now, my creativity brings me into flow. What a ride!

Feeling strong emotions can be an excellent opportunity to better understand our needs, to practice acceptance and mindful choice of love. If we stay with the emotion and accept the way we feel, the energy eventually transforms. By letting it flow without judging ourselves, we allow the energy to freely move.

Old Hawaii tradition of Ho’oponopono puts it nicely in just a few words:
I accept you. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you.