Do you need to split or quit?

November 22nd, 2014

Looking from the outside… one might assume that my life has not changed too much. I kept waking up at the same time in the morning, working for the same corporation, living a happy family life; even my friends remained the same That is, however, far from saying that the Inner Game program which was personally led by the coaching guru Tim Gallweydidn’t have much effect on me. On the contrary. The program I have recently underwent was profoundly transformative.

As life-changing asit was for me, it was not as externally dramatic as that of many other coaches who participated in this event. Each of my peers were uniquely beautiful and inspirational; and several of them actually quit their jobs or finished their romantic relationships or marriages before the program even culminated! One could joke that this coaching training happened to have quite a high split & quit rate ;)

How could anyone aspire to help others in transforming their lives and careers without having dealt first with their own “mess”?

Since the first day I was amazed by the number of synchronicities that occurred;

IMG_1114 (2)it actually felt as if the universe was with me as I was entering this new reality. One which takes much less effort and brings more joy. One in which I experience an unprecedented level of trust and openness among people who barely know each other to begin with. One which expands the limits of what is possible. One that flows easily and brings everything to me at the right time. I could think of someone and the next moment I had a phone call or mail from the very person… I wish I could describe the feelings which accompanied the six months process:

Awe, relief, fun, serenity, love, eagerness …to name just a few. The pace at which our minds and hearts re-set was unbelievable, the room was full of it and sometimes it was nearly palpable...

There is always an inner game being played in your mind no matter what outer game you are playing. How you play this game usually makes the difference between success and failure.

Tim Gallwey

What exactly happened to me?

Everything felt highly intense. IMG_1138 (2)The words we said, the exercises we did, the emotions we felt, the food we ate…. We laughed a lot and played like kids. I spotted a few rainbows and clover leaves. I played golf with my eyes closed (and actually hit the hole!). I led a group yoga session for an increased awareness. I realized how by choosing just a single but powerful word I could help someone perform beyond what he believed is possible. I met a bunch of wonderful new soul mates. While coaching each other, we identified what we have and have not control over and redefined some of our core negative beliefs. Everyone of us understood that we are experiencing unprecedented moments. I learned how I can trust my true self and follow my internal compass rather than expectations of others. I found courage to express who I am and what I care (and don’t care) about. I explored my definition of “work”. Instead of “doing things I am paid for” I chose to look at every day as an opportunity for fulfillment of my personal vision. The KPI shifted from “# of things I deliver” to “# of people I inspire”. I stopped justifying my job performance through the flawed premise of hard work and applied my true self in everything I do, looking for the potential learning and joy. An unexpected side effect was that this new mindset happened to boost my performance...

What is your definition of “work”? How well does it serve you?

At one point Tim asked me a question that truly woke me up. Answering it was very painful, but it skyrocketed my ability to move in the direction of my own desires without judgment or shame. Probably for the first time in my life I became fully aware of how much freedom and mobility I have in my choices.

How about you? Do you need to split or quit to be yourself?

As a result of this experience I am more loving and less judging. I am grateful for all the stepping stones that led me to discover my own inner game. Thanks to it I know I am always in the right place at the right time and I can be and do anything I wish. The sense of serenity and fulfillment is priceless…

Growth and learning is not systematic, but organic. Try to teach acorn to grow into a tree… You grow while you go.

Tim Gallwey

Strangely, or funnily enough, my job role spells Growth leader. I believe that personal growth is like a spiral leading to infinity. Which is why the more we know, the more unknown we are exposed to and aware of. And here comes the part I enjoy the most – both the learning and the fun seem to have no end; they keep evolving and growing.

I am thrilled beyond measure to be living this wonderful life, seeing the many possibilities of how it may unfold, and the variety of ways we inspire each other on our unique life journeys. Therefore, I hope you don’t mind I end with a personal note to Tim:

Thank you,

for such liberating (and still seemingly unrepeatable!) coaching experience, your kind sharing of life-long wisdom and endless flow of inspiration, conveyed via uniquely provocative yet entertaining storytelling.

So glad I caught this wave ;)

It’s been a ride of a lifetime..!





24.11.2014 23:31

Thank you very much for sharing this. In the process of splitting or quitting to be ourselves I experienced that we some times forget that we always have a choice and that we can be at the right place, it's a matter of step back and take the time to think.

26.11.2014 20:55

I love your note on applying our free will, Vidal! In most cases we react rather than consciously respond; we literally forgot our response-ability. And apart from life threatening situations (which happen rarely) there is always some time & space we can grant ourselves to make our choice. That's the real game changer... Thanks for sharing.